MONICA BATISTE

  • Home
    • Yoga Classes
    • FAQ
    • Yoga for Little Bears
    • Media and Testimonials
    • Events >
      • Paint and Play
    • About Monica
  • Artist
    • Art exhibitions
    • Book Illustrations by Monica Batiste
  • Yoga Classes
    • Growing Emotional Intelligence through Yoga workshops
  • Store
    • Yoga for Little Bears
    • Book Illustrations by Monica Batiste >
      • Love your Dragon
      • Follow Your Dreams
    • Art & Words publishing
    • Wholesale products Monica Batiste
  • Online Beach Yoga
    • Beach Yoga classes during Isolation Monica Batiste
  • Blog

6/3/2015

Portrait of my Mother

Comments

Read Now
 
Monica Batiste

In 1945, two months before WW2 ended, my mothers’ home town of Dresden was destroyed. For three days it bombed and burned. My mother and grandmother hid in the underground shelters. When they emerged, their town was no more.

Mum escaped East Germany through an unpatrolled border, and became a dancer. She left Germany in her 20s, and sadly had to leave her young son behind.

She met my father in Singapore and they married 6 months later. After migrating to Australia, my mother started a new family and tried to leave it all behind.

I always wanted to know about my German roots. ‘please teach me German’ I would ask. ‘Please teach me to write to my Oma’ I also wrote letters to my lost brother, but they were always returned.

‘I can never go back’ my mother said.


I visited Dresden in 2010 on my belated honeymoon. It had been rebuilt and was beautiful. My mother’s flat was on a corner.  The river ran warm at the end of the street, and the Fraunkirche chimed on the hour.

‘You must come’ I told her. ‘You must visit Dresden now it is re-built’.

It took us 2 years to convince her.

In 2012 my mother and her three Aussie children travelled to Germany. The highlight was reuniting with her son, and our brother Ralf, in Köln. It was the happiest I’ve ever seen my mum. He had become a professional musician and we met his lovely wife and their young daughter.

After meeting Ralf, we travelled to Dresden.

We arrived in the town square and the Fraunkirche bells chimed.
I cried.
My mother hadn’t heard the church bells for 60 years.


We went to a local restaurant for dinner.

My mother wouldn’t put down her bag, and her posture was upright, as though she was waiting for something.

‘Relax’ I said to mum. ‘Look, they have dumplings and sauerkraut.’

‘Eat’ I say.

‘I’m not sure I’m hungry’ she says, hiding some of her dinner in a tissue, and placing it into the bag that sat on her elbow. ‘I think I will take this home for later.’

I speak to her in German. She speaks to me in English.

We arrive home in Australia 3 weeks later.

My mother puts down her bag, and takes off her shoes. The wall behind her displays an original drawing of the Fraunkirche.

She will never see Germany again.

She will never see Ralf again.

She will never again hear the church bells ring.

I decide to paint a portrait of my mother.
I am reusing an old canvas.

I originally did a painting of my daughter on this canvas, but it didn’t work out, so I painted over it with clouds. I was dealing with depression, and I wrote all the words I wanted to say.

I choose sepia as my palette.

I hide the words with my paint but some of them show through.


I find my mother in the darkness. 
‘I am doing a painting of you’ I tell her.

‘From where?’ she asks.


I haven’t painted my mother for over 30 years. The last painting I did of her, she threw away. She didn't like to see herself.  I am not going to show her this one. I know she won’t like it.
But I like it.
It’s my mother.

I am worried about what she will think.

‘It’s from Dresden, you know, in that restaurant where we had that enormous dinner.’

She smiles, but says nothing.
I am adding darker colours. My brush has loosened and I noticed it is angrily filling in spaces. I don’t know why my brush is angry. Is it angry over what happened in Dresden? Is it angry because a city full of refugees, woman and children were destroyed? Is it angry that my mother never got to realise her full potential? Is it angry because we never got to realise the fullness of our mother-daughter relationship?

I don’t know.

But the brush keeps painting.

The brush creates spaces and ignores edges.

The darkness lingers.
I saw her for dinner last week, at her retirement village. 
It was happy hour at the restaurant. Her friends were singing around the piano as we arrived. They held up their wine and smiled as we passed. 

'They look so happy' I said. 


'Look, there's Shirley' she said. 'Shirley is teaching me how to paint.'
'Really?' I ask. 'You, paint?'
'Yes,' She said. 'You must come see them sometime.'
'I will.' I smiled. 'I'd love to.'


Share

Comments
Details

    About Monica

    I am a yoga teacher, author and artist.
    I earn my income through teaching yoga, painting, and creating books. I specialise in supporting children, schools, and families to grow into their best selves.
    I would appreciate a review and feedback so that I can continue to grow and improve my work.
    My husband and I share four beautiful daughters, and seven awesome grandchildren. We live north of Brisbane, Australia. Our next step is to explore the world, continue to connect with our family, and to serve wherever we can.
    You can follow me on Teacherspayteachers, Facebook or Instagram. I hope to meet you on one of my travels. I am happy to do free talks for schools and parent groups.
    Love.
    Monica. 

    Blogs by Monica

    Growing Emotional Intelligence
    1. Growing Emotional Intelligence through Virtues
    2. QUIZ on self-esteem
    3. Random acts of Kindness
    4. Virtues are the Building blocks of character
    5. Creating a Vision Board
    6. How to Visualise your goals
    7. Challenging my working class status​
    Yoga 
    1. PTSD and Yoga
    2. ​Yoga and Stress
    3. ​Balancing life with Yoga
    4. Growing Self-Esteem through Yoga 
    5. Yoga at 14000 feet
    6. Yoga under the sea
    7. Meditating with Dog poo
    On Publishing
    1. 15 Steps on Self-Publishing your book
    2. Creating children's book 'Yoga for Little Bears'
    3. Self Publishing
    4. 'If you put your mind to it, you can accomplish anything' Marty Mcfly
    on Life
    1. My Dad on ANZAC day
    2. How I borrowed Professors Brain for a Credit
    3. Challenging my working class status
    ART
    1. Portrait of my mother
    2. How I turned my speeding fine into a painting 
    3. Art is the seat of creation 

    Archives

    April 2018
    October 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    December 2015
    June 2015
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    August 2013
    May 2013
    January 2013
    November 2012
    October 2012
    April 2012
    December 2011
    August 2011
    March 2011
    January 2011

    Categories

    All
    Acknowledgment
    Affirmations
    Anzac
    Art
    Art In Schools
    Assignments
    Awards
    Balance
    Beach
    Bells Beach
    Brain Gym
    Children
    Children's Books
    Class System
    Commitment
    Creativity
    Dancers Pose
    Emotional Intelligence
    Fiji
    Geoff Batiste
    Goals
    Goal Setting
    Grades
    Happiness
    Humour
    Inner Peace
    Joy
    Jump The Beach Redcliffe
    Kidsyoga
    Kindness
    Law Of Attraction
    Live Your Dreams
    Love
    Mature Age Student
    Meditation
    Military
    Monica Batiste
    Neuroplasticity
    Parachute
    Personal Development
    Personal Development Curriculum
    Personal Development In Schools
    Physical Health Curriculum
    Positive
    Positive Experiences
    Randomactsofkindness
    Scuba Diving
    Soldiers
    Study
    Support For Parents
    Support For Teachers
    Suttons Beach
    Tree Pose
    University
    Vietnam
    Virtues
    Vision
    Vision Board
    Visualisation
    Yoga
    Yoga Balance
    Yoga Poses

    RSS Feed

Teacher
Yoga classes


Artist
Visit my Arty website
​

Buy prints and more from Redbubble


Author
Store

Contact
Email
Phone

About Monica



  • Home
    • Yoga Classes
    • FAQ
    • Yoga for Little Bears
    • Media and Testimonials
    • Events >
      • Paint and Play
    • About Monica
  • Artist
    • Art exhibitions
    • Book Illustrations by Monica Batiste
  • Yoga Classes
    • Growing Emotional Intelligence through Yoga workshops
  • Store
    • Yoga for Little Bears
    • Book Illustrations by Monica Batiste >
      • Love your Dragon
      • Follow Your Dreams
    • Art & Words publishing
    • Wholesale products Monica Batiste
  • Online Beach Yoga
    • Beach Yoga classes during Isolation Monica Batiste
  • Blog